Monday, April 05, 2010

Reflections on Lazy

Watching the world go by in Barcelona....
When did lazy become a bad word? It feels, right now, like a North American label. One that places judgement on "doing nothing". But, it is through doing "nothing" that is the seed of great creativity for some. Where do ideas come from? Where does art come from? Where does inspiration break through if one is always going at breakneck speed?

I am learning to embrace my inner laziness. Heh. There will be some that will tell me that I do not need more practice at this (hee hee!), but, really, it's a journey. Now I'm not talking about couch potato laziness, plugged into a television until time disappears (although there is some value in that too sometimes), but just the general state of not having an agenda in one's life, and going with the flow.

I am thinking about lazy today because I've been finding my way back to my creativity this week, when I was able to truly be still for the first time since I returned from Europe. Olympics and Paralympics are over, no more moving places for a bit (I'm in week 5 at this place, will be here 2 months in total), a bit of a break in the contract work I've been doing, and just less busy with errands and social engagements. Just time. For just me. And, just like magic, although I know myself well enough to know it would come, my creative side starts to really emerge, and I am just happier than usual to be around me.

What comes to mind as I write this is the old men of Europe, sitting around the city squares, just watching the world go by. Women too, of course, though the men jumped to mind first, they have this down to perfection it seems. It would be hard to translate the word lazy into their local language in a way that would make sense. They are just being.

I love life like this. I had plenty of time to be like this on my trip - and it's because of knowing this about myself that, for the most part, I spent a month in each city I visited. I got a couple of things from that. One was connecting with myself in this way. Just the space to reflect. And observe. And be. And create. The other was getting a real sense of the culture where I was that one cannot possibly get in whirlwind travel. They have a name for this: slow travel. I guess it sounds better than lazy travel. lol. I wasn't lazy all the time, but I had lazy periods. Relaxed periods. Days at a time when I didn't have anything on my agenda, often not even an idea of what I was going to do on each day until I found myself doing it.

Finding this space is probably the biggest adjustment I have had returning "home". I've not been pushing myself, but it's still hard to grasp sometimes. It's something I don't want to learn the knack of. In the life I had before I left, I had these times, but they were mostly moments, short interludes, felt only when I'd paused enough in the craziness of my life to sleep and shake off the tiredness.... then it would seem I'd need to go back to the zoom zoom do do go go.

I don't know much, but I want to live in a world largely absent of zoom zoom do do go go. Now, to create that, if not all the time (um, there is that small matter of money!), then for a larger slice of my pie of life.


Ann-Katrin said...

You know, just throwing out or at least banning watching TV helps getting that time and space to just be. Its to à great extent about view on life and priorities. It's not that it's so much more hectic on your side of the pond,it's just time spent in a different way - and citiesbeing built differently.

Roberta said...

Hi, funny you should say that. I arrived home from Europe not missing TV at all and picturing a life without it. But already I am falling into the trap, somewhat. Gotta keep that vision. But I really like what you say about cities being built differently, and I miss the city squares that I found throughout Europe. The challenge to me is to find that essence here, I'll just have to look harder. Thx for the feedback!